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Chapter 2 - Consequences

THURSDAY, 9.30PM, WHITE HOUSE 

"Josh," Leo called down the corridor, Josh turned and reluctantly waited. "You going home?" Leo asked.

"Yeah. It's 9.30, I've finished all my work."

"You dealt with Hunter?" Leo asked as they continued walking.

"The report's on your desk."

"And the road people?"

"We going to do this everyday from now on?" Josh asked. "'Cos if you're going to check on everything I do, you may as well do it yourself." He opened the door to the lobby. "If that's all, I'm going home."

As Leo watched Josh walk through the lobby he felt a range of emotions. One being anger at Josh for his insolent attitude, but he was also worried that Josh really wasn't handling the situation all that well. 

"He knows he messed up."

Leo turned to face Toby. "He really messed up, Toby. This isn't something that's fixable and it isn't the first time."

"He's human, he is allowed to make mistakes."

"Yes. But we have to live with the consequences."

Toby knew that, he'd been dealing with the fallout for almost two weeks now. He felt he should mention something that had been bothering him for a few days. "We don't really know what happened, Leo."

"If there's more, he should tell us. You off home?"

"Yeah. You want to check I've done all my work before I go?" Toby asked.

Leo was a little taken a back by Toby's comment, and "No," was all he managed in reply.

"Just Josh then? I'll see you tomorrow."

Leo watched Toby walk away. "Toby," he called. "Is he alright?"

Toby looked at Leo like he'd lost his mind. "I wouldn't have thought so, no."

An hour later Leo was reading Josh's report on Hunter. It was very well written, all the i's were dotted and the t's were crossed. A perfect report, not the sort he usually received from Josh. Leo could almost feel Josh's anger and resentment seeping out of the paper. He sighed and put it in his Out tray. 

He really had been angry with Josh, he still was. He couldn't believe he could have been so stupid as to anger Congressman Phillips to the extent that he changed parties. They've been trying to spin the mess for almost two weeks now. Toby and CJ both thought it was time to leave it alone. There was no way Phillips was coming back to them, not unless he got Josh's head. And while Leo had been sorely tempted, he wasn't willing to be blackmailed in that way. Toby was angry with Josh at first, but now he seemed sympathetic, he even commented that Josh wasn't Mandy, they couldn't just keep him out of the loop as a punishment.

"Still here then?" Jed asked from the doorway.

"Mr President. Just finishing reading some reports."

"From Josh?" Jed asked.

"Yeah."

"You could try talking to him. It'd save a fortune in paper," Jed commented."How long are you going punish him?"

"I'm not punishing him, Sir. He screwed up, majorly screwed up. He's been taking too much on and going off on his own missions too often."

"So you thought you'd rein him in."

"Mr President, all due respect, I thought staff was my department?"

"It is," Jed agreed. He wondered though if Leo realized quite how much he had hurt Josh. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Night, Mr President."

THURSDAY 11PM, GEORGETOWN

"Are you going to let me in or do I sit here all night?" Toby asked Josh's answer phone. 

Josh sighed. Toby's been outside for almost an hour now. He'd followed him through the parking lot. He'd followed him out of the parking lot and then he'd followed him back to the apartment. Josh walked to the intercom and pressed the button. A minute later Toby was stood at his front door. "What?" Josh asked.

Toby held out a six pack of beer, which had two missing. "I started without you."

Josh held the door open, "Come in then."

Toby walked into the lounge and sat on the sofa. The apartment was too quiet, there were empty beer bottles on the coffee table and, unusually, the TV wasn't on. Even when Josh was at his lowest after Rosslyn, he still insisted on watching the news. "What's going on?" Toby asked.

"If you mean work, then I'm hardly likely to know the answer to that, am I."

"So you thought you'd sit here and brood?"

"Actually no. I've made a decision."

"That's what I was afraid of."

"I know I screwed up. I'm the first to admit that it was a stupid thing to say in front of reporters. I know Leo's pissed as hell at me, and he's every right to be, as do you and CJ. But if he doesn't trust me to do the job anymore....."

"Who says he doesn't trust you?"

"He's checking everything I do. I'm virtually banned from meetings and from using my initiative. He's taken half my work away from me. Christ, Toby, he's got you and Will staffing the President."

"He's angry."

"It's more than that. He doesn't trust my judgment anymore. To be honest, and I may have too many of these," he added an empty beer bottle to the ones already on the table, "I'm not sure I trust my judgment anymore. So in that case there's no point in my being there. Phillips wants my head, House Democrats want my head. I say give it to them."

"You want to be a martyr?"

"No. A martyr dies for his beliefs not his screw ups."

Toby had thought Josh looked tired since before his run in with Congressman Phillips. Now though, as he studied Josh's face, looked at his eyes, he saw it was more than that. "Are you alright?"

"Am I alright?"

"I mean... is everything alight, besides... work and Phillips." Toby watched Josh for a response, hoping he would understand what he meant without him having to say it. Although if he had to ask outright, he would. Hard as he'd find it.

"Well my mom had her car stolen and my microwave broke, other than that......"

Toby glared at Josh. "Have you, are you sleeping?"

Josh looked down for a second and then back up at Toby. "You mean have I had any episodes?" he asked.

"Yes." 

"You think that could be an excuse for my behavior. 'Hey, it's OK he screwed up 'cos he's got PTSD.'  You really think that'll make Leo trust me."

"I don't care about Leo," Toby snapped. "Forget work. I want to know.... yeah, I want to know if you've had any episodes. And don't lie to me......."

"I'm fine."

"Don't_lie_to_me," Toby shouted. "I thought we'd agreed. I thought you promised not to keep this stuff to yourself. When you can't deal with it alone, you..... you said you'd tell me."

Josh knew that. He knew that he'd made that promise to Toby after he was diagnosed. Toby was the one person he could talk to who didn't fuss round him and check on him every five minutes. Normally Donna noticed when he was having problems and then he'd talk to her, but he sometimes thought that was more for Donna than himself, to stop her worrying. "The anniversary was hard this year."

"I know, I was there, but that was over a month ago."

"It started up again."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I couldn't."

"Why?"

"No one's been too keen to talk to me recently, Toby. You included," Josh snapped.

"That was work, this is.... Does Donna know?"

"I think so. She keeps bringing me coffee." A fleeting smile crossed Josh's face, "Although she does that when she thinks I'm about to be fired."

"You're not going to be fired. Josh, you have to talk to someone."

"I've talked to Stanley."

"And?"

"He wants me to go and see my therapist."

"Why haven't you?"

"I'd have to tell Leo where I was going."

"You think he wouldn't let you?"

Josh looked angry again. "I think his faith in me is possibly at the lowest ever and a trip to a psychiatrist may just destroy what little's left."

THURSDAY 11.45, WHITE HOUSE

"Leo."

"Mr President, I thought you'd left?"

"I came back. I want to talk to you, as a friend not your President."

"About what?"

"Josh." Jed sat down.

"Sir, I thought we'd covered this?"

Jed ignored Leo and carried on. "Do you remember just after Christmas last year, the remote prayer thing?"

"Yeah."

"You remember how strongly Josh argued for it?"

"Yeah, he didn't want to loose the vote."

"Nah, that wasn't it."

"I seem to remember you saying that to him. Something about babies and bubbles."

"No. That wasn't what I was going to say to him. After you'd all left I told him he'd toss it all overboard to avoid disappointing you. I told him that he wanted to be the guy the guy counted on."

"I think you're wrong."

"He didn't argue with me., which is pretty rare for Josh." Jed studied Leo. "Come on, Leo, we both know the reason he works so damn hard for this administration isn't just me, in fact it's mainly you. And he does work hard, too hard at times. Maybe you're right to reduce his work load. But I think you're wrong to shut him out."

"Sir, due respect...."

"Screw your respect, Leo. Do you know how much you've hurt him. Have you looked at him lately?"

"So I'm suppose to let him say what he wants so as not to upset him, to massage his ego?" Leo asked.

"Of course not. And it's not ego massaging. He knows he screwed up and he knows how pissed everyone is at him. None of you are as angry with him as he is with himself. God, Leo, I thought you cared about Josh."

"I do care about him. But this isn't personal. He didn't scratch my new car for God sake. This is work....."

"Yes, and that's more important to you at times than people isn't it?" Jed asked angrily. "Jenny certainly realized that. Does Jordan know?"

"We really aren't President and Chief Of Staff at the moment are we?" Leo reply was equally angry. "You think I should go easy on Josh 'cos he needs my approval. He's not ten."

"I think you're being a lot harder on Josh than you would have been on Toby or CJ or Will. I think he's disappointed you and you're angry and I think you're making this personal even if you think you're not." Jed calmed down and looked at his friend. "Josh can take being reprimanded as well as anyone, but you've hurt him, Leo. You've shut him out. You've got Toby and Will, Will who'd been here nine months, going to meetings with him. You've taken work off him. You're making him write reports on everything he does and get your approval before he takes any action. You're treating him like an intern."

"How I choose to use the staff is my decision. If you want me...."

"I'm not going to tell you to involve him in things again. That is your decision." Jed voice hardened, "But I want him staffing me again. Toby and Will are fine, but I need Josh in there. No one can analyze the information and tell me how it affects everything else as quickly, accurately or honestly as Josh."

"I'll tell him tomorrow."

"Fine." Jed knew he'd annoyed Leo and he was about to do it some more. "Assuming he's still here tomorrow."

"Meaning?"

"You think he's going to stay here if he thinks no one trusts him anymore, if he believes you've lost faith in him. If you're not careful, Leo, you, we, are going to loose him. I'll see you tomorrow."

FRIDAY MORNING, 6.00am, CoS OFFICE

When Toby walked into Leo's office he wasn't surprised to find his boss is already working. "Do you have a minute?" 

"You're in early."

"Yeah. I need to talk to you about Josh."

"Not you as well," Leo sighed. "Go on."

"I went to see him last night. He's pretty down, Leo." Toby had spent most of the night awake trying to decide what to do about Josh. He'd not wanted to leave him last night and he'd phone Donna and asked her to call round this morning. He knew he shouldn't be betraying Josh's confidence. He knew that Josh was right and Leo's faith in him has taken a battering. But he didn't care. He wasn't willing to let the situation deteriorate to how it was at Christmas 2000.

"He's brooding," Leo replied.

"No he isn't. I think.... He isn't sleeping. He's..... You knew he wasn't well around the anniversary."

"Yeah. He spoke to Stanley, he saw his therapist. He said he was okay."

"Yeah." Toby decided to leave that one for now and changed tactics. "He thinks you don't trust him anymore. I seriously think he's going to quit."

"Did he tell you that?"

"He told me you don't trust his judgment. Is he right?"

"No. I do trust him."

"Then what's going on? Because if you're just trying to punish him, you're doing a damn good job."

"You know I've already had this conversation with the President," Leo complained. "You really think he's going to quit?"

"What would you do if you thought you weren't trusted anymore?" Toby asked before his temper finally boiled over and he admitted what he had been bothering him all night. "You know he's told no one he's in trouble, that he's not sleeping, that he's.....  he's told none of us because he figured we were pissed enough and PTSD on top of that would, to quote him, destroy what little faith we have left in him."

Leo was stunned by Toby's words and by his outburst. "I'll talk to him."

"It may be too late. You know Sam's thinking of running for the mayor's office?"

"Yeah. You think Josh would quit and go and work there?"

"I think it's a distinct possibility. I think Josh has reached the end of his tether, Leo. I think with everything that's happened over the last three years, this is maybe one thing too many."

"I'll talk to him."

8.00am CoS OFFICE

Josh didn't say a word during senior staff. He sat in the corner of Leo's couch and, although he was half listening, he wasn't interested. What was the point? None of it was going to involve him anyway. Donna knew what he was thinking of doing. She'd told him to think about it some more, to give it more time. He agreed, to please her, but he doubted he was going to change his mind.

"Josh, Josh," Leo was saying. CJ nudged Josh who looked at Leo. "Wait behind," Leo told him.

As CJ, Will and Toby walked back to their offices CJ asked, "Is Josh alright?"

"He doesn't look it," Will commented.

"My office," Toby replied. Once the door was closed, Toby sat down and wondered what to say. 

"Toby?" Will asked.

"He's thinking of quitting," Toby told them.

"You're not serious?" CJ asked. "I know Leo's pissed at him, hell we're all pissed at him, but he wouldn't quit. Josh loves this job."

"Not recently he doesn't." Will said, "Anyway, I agree with him."

"You what?" CJ asked angrily, "You want him to quit?"

"No, of course I don't. But if I was being treated like he is, I'd quit," Will told her. 

"And so would you," Toby added. "In fact you almost did."

"Yeah," CJ reluctantly agreed. "I know we've been hard on him, but he normally bounces right back."

"I don't think it's us," Toby said.

" Leo," CJ guessed.

"He thinks Leo doesn't trust him."

"Does Leo know that?" Will asked. "Because if he doesn't I think someone should tell him, before it's too late."

"You volunteering?" CJ asked.

"I already did," Toby said. "And so did the President, apparently."

"Then he'd better fix it, 'cos I don't think we can do this without Josh."

Once the other staff had left his office, Leo turned his attention to Josh. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. What do you want?" Josh knew he was bordering on insolence, but he was past caring.

Leo stood and closed the office doors, before sitting in the chair across from Josh. "Tell me what's going on."

"Nothing," Josh said. "I'm not allowed to do anything without your permission, so until you tell me what to do, then nothing."

Leo ignored the sarcasm. "I didn't mean work."

"Then it's none of your business. Can I go now?" Josh went to stand.

"No. Sit down. You think I'm being hard on you?" Leo asked.

"I screwed up, I know that. And you've made your position very clear."

As Leo looked at Josh he realized that Jed was right. Josh was hurting. Leo hadn't realize he had that sort of power over Josh, it was quite frightening and it worried him. If they were going to carry on working together he had to be able to reprimand Josh without Josh falling apart. But then Jed was right there as well, Josh can take criticism as well as anyone, so maybe there was more to this than he first thought. He also realized that Toby was right. "You don't look well, Josh."

Although he had been seriously considering handing in his resignation there was a voice in the back of his mind, actually it was Donna's voice, telling him that he should think some more about it first. "I was going to ask for some leave next week."

"That's pretty sort notice."

"You think you'd miss me?" Josh asked quietly before his temper breaks free. "I could sit in my office all day and doing nothing and it'd make no difference. Some days I don't know why the hell I bother getting out of bed. If you don't trust me anymore, Leo, if the president doesn't trust me, then you should just tell me. I think you owe me that."

"Of course I trust you."

"Well you've got a damn funny way of showing it."

Leo had wanted to talk to Josh, to explain his actions, but Josh's attitude made him angry. "You seem to be forgetting that you work for me and you do as I tell you. This is your job. I don't owe you anything." Leo was well aware that he'd gone too far. This was Josh for God's sake.

"Then it's a good job I serve at the pleasure of the president," Josh replied in a voice that was far too hard for Leo's liking. "Can I go?"

"You're staffing the president today."

Josh looked at Leo and wondered who's idea that was, but decided he didn't want to know.

An hour later and Leo hadn't been able to concentrate on anything. He went to see Josh, to resolve things one way or another. He walked into his deputy's office and closed the door. "I think we need to talk."

"Go on."

Leo sighed and sat in the visitor's chair. "If I didn't trust you anymore, you wouldn't still be here." When Josh didn't reply, Leo continued. "I've spent the last twelve days defending you, although it seems no one here's noticed," he couldn't help but comment. "I've kept you away from meetings, from the Oval Office, from the press, but not because I don't trust you. They wanted your head on a platter, Josh, I could have given it to them."

"Except that you won't give in to blackmail. Don't try and kid yourself you've been protecting me, rather than the administration. If that was the case you'd have told me." Josh reached into his backpack and pulled an envelope out. "I told Donna I wouldn't do this until I'd thought about it some more. But there's nothing left to think about."

Leo took the envelope off him, but didn't open it. "I'm not accepting this. You're not resigning because Phillips won't come back to us."

"No I'm not. Phillips is an idiot who has his own agenda. Everything I said was right and you know it. I understand you couldn't defend me publicly, I didn't expect you to. But you shut me out. You treated me like, I don't know. I know you're angry with me. I'm angry with me. But I meant every word I said to Phillips. He's a bigot, he's hated me since I worked for Earl Brennan. You heard what I said to him, but you never thought to ask why, to ask what he'd said to me. You just assumed I'd gone off on one. So no matter how much you say you trust me, you don't. The administration is your priority, and that's fine. I don't care anymore. I'm not sure I've cared for some time now. If you don't accept my resignation that's your prerogative, but you can't force me into work."

Leo stared at Josh and suddenly felt like he was loosing a part of himself. "What did he say to you?"

"It doesn't matter now, it's too late."

Leo left Josh's office and knew that this was almost beyond repairing. He could only think of one, maybe two people who could fix it. As much as he wished he were on that list, he knew he has no chance. He walked to Toby's office. "I'm sorry, Will, can you give us a minute?"

"Sure." Will glanced at Toby and left the office.

Leo sat down. "I know it's probably a little late to ask, but do you know what did Phillips said to Josh?"

"He wouldn't tell me," Toby admitted. He'd asked Josh a couple of days ago, but Josh had told him that it wasn't important anymore. "Why?"

"Because... he must have baited him. Who else was there?"

"It was at the end of the meeting, I think they were alone but I can find out. Leo, what's happened?"

Leo stood and walked to the door. "He resigned."

"You haven't accepted?"

"Of course I haven't. But, as he quite rightly pointed out, I can hardly force him to come into work."

"I'll find out." After Leo had left, Toby went to see Josh.

"He's in with the President," Donna told him.

"Doing what?" Toby asked nervously.

"Staffing."

"Okay. Do you know who else was at the meeting with Phillips?"

"Not this again. I thought maybe we were moving on."

Toby glanced around the bullpen, but no one was within earshot. "He resigned."

"What? He told me he'd wait." She lead Toby into Josh's office. "Do you know how hurt he feels. He waited for one of you to ask what happened, but no one did. The only ones who asked why he said that to Phillips were Charlie and Sam."

"Did he tell them?"

"I don't know."

"Did he tell you?"

"Yes, but he made me promise to say nothing."

"What did he say?"

"Him and Josh have a history going back years, you know that?"

"Yeah."

The final meeting in the Oval Office was over and Josh gathered his papers. Jed walked behind his desk and smiled at Josh. "Don't tell Toby or Will, but that was better."

Josh smiled a little sadly, "Thank you, Sir."

"Josh, you're not thinking of doing anything stupid are you?"

"More stupid than normal, Sir?" Josh asked.

"I'm serious, Josh. This administration needs you, I need you."

"This was your idea then?"

"What did he say to you?"

"Who?"

"Congressman Phillips, what did he say to you? I know he baited you."

"It's not important, I shouldn't have reacted like I did."

"I can order you to tell me," Jed said, only half in jest.

"It doesn't matter now, I've already given Leo my resignation."

Jed smile faded and he stared at Josh. "You can't be serious." He glanced at Leo office. "He hasn't accepted, surely?"

"No."

"Good. I know we were all angry...."

"Sir, I don't care whether you're all angry with me for the rest of the term.  I can't work were I'm not trusted."

"This should have been handled differently. It can't be too late surely?"

Josh watched Jed. He couldn't quite believe that the President was virtually pleading with him not to quit. "Sir, you once told me that the staff have to trust Leo more than you. Well that applies the other way. He automatically assumed that I said that to Phillips for no reason, that I was just sounding off. He never once considered.... It doesn't matter anymore."

"Yes it does, Josh. Even if you're intent on leaving, it still matters. You can't leave things like this with Leo."

"You think the ball's in my court?"

"No it's in his," Jed admitted. "But you have to be prepared to listen to him."

Continued........