Follow The Directions

"Margaret. Which exit do we take...... yeah I know you did, I forgot them........ no, they're on my desk.... Can you just tell me the exit....... thank you." Leo hung up his cell phone. "16," he told Josh.

"You forgot the directions?" Josh asked as he drove past exit 14.

"Don't you start, I've enough with Margaret."

"And where do we go from the freeway?"

Leo sighed and called Margaret back. "Where do we go from the freeway?.......Yeah..... No, I can remember...... Okay, thanks." Leo laughed as he hung up the phone.

"What?"

"She says it's easy to find if you follow the directions."

"Well there's another for the Margaret museum," Josh grinned. "Hang on a minute, that was 13."

"So we're three away."

"No, 'cos the last one was 14."

"Oh for God's sake, Josh," Leo sighed.

"Hey I'm just driving, I'm not the one......"

"Come off at the next exit and turn round."

Twenty minutes later. "Which way?" Josh asked.

"Something about going up the hill."

Josh rolled his eyes. "Phone Margaret."

"She gets stropy."

"Leo, just phone her or we're going to be driving round here all night."

"It's 3 o'clock in the afternoon."

"That's my point," Josh grinned.

"Fine I'll phone her." Leo took out his cell phone and dialed his office number. "Hey, Margaret."

"Are you there yet?"

"No, we're still looking for it. We came off the freeway where you said."

"And you took the second turn on the left, then the first on the right, past the church, up the hill and take the second right turn after the gas station."

"Yeah, I think we did something like that. I thought you said this was easy to find?"

"It is."

"Second right turn after the gas station?"

"Yes. Then there's a car dealership, turn right and then left and you can't miss it, it's on the left. "

"Okay." Leo hung up and glanced at Josh. "Did we pass a gas station?"

"No."

"How about a church?"

"About half a mile back. Should we head back to the freeway and start again?"

"No. Go back to the church."

"How do you know it's the right church?"

"Well we can at least ask for directions."

"I guess," Josh replied dubiously.

"What?"

"Well, when she gives you the directions wouldn't it be a good idea to write them down?"

"I am not calling her back."

"So we're just going to take the second right after every gas station we see?"

"Pull over."

"What?"

"Pull over."

"Okay," Josh pulled into the side of the road and stopped.

"You call Margaret, I'll drive."

"Because?"

"I'm your boss."

"And you're scared of your assistant?" Josh suggested.

"Yeah," Leo muttered as he climbed out of the car and they swapped seats. "What you doing?" he asked, when Josh started to rummage around in the back of the car.

"I need a pen and paper from my backpack."

"You can actually find stuff in there?"

"Yes, provided Donna hasn't been routing." Josh sat in the passenger seat with his backpack on his knee. "Okay, go back to the freeway and we'll start again," he told Leo when he retrieved a notepad and a biro from the depths of the backpack and threw the bag onto the back seat.

 Leo adjusted the driver's seat and turned the car around, while Josh phoned Margaret.

"Hey, it's Josh."

"Oh God, you're not still lost?"

"Yeah. We're going back to the freeway and we'll start again. Can you give me the directions."

"Have you got a pen and paper?"

"Yes."

"They're still lost," Josh heard Margaret say. "They're completely hopeless."

"Shouldn't be allowed out without some kind of supervision," he heard Donna reply.

"Margaret," Josh said, "You do know that the mute button doesn't work on your phone don't you?"

"Oh. Right, the directions." Margaret read out the directions, again, and Josh wrote them down. "Read them back to me," she instructed.

"I've got them."

"Read them back."

Josh read back what he'd just written down. 

"Good. Phone me when you get there," Margaret told him.

"Yes, mom," Josh grinned as he hung up.

"You wouldn't have said that if we weren't a thousand mile away," Leo smiled.

"Take the first right," Josh instructed. "What are we doing now?" he asked as Leo pulled to a stop.

"I didn't think it was good idea to drive with a flat."

"I'll call the auto club."

"You can't change a wheel?" Leo grinned.

"I'm sure I could if I really had to, but the car rental included membership of a breakdown service so......."

"Get the spare wheel."

"Which will be where?" Josh asked.

"Seriously?" Leo replied with a smile. "It'll be in the trunk, with the tools."

"There's no need for the 'talking to an idiot' voice. At least I can remember directions," Josh muttered as he opened the trunk, removed the lining, which he was impressed he didn't have to ask about, and took out the spare wheel, the jack and the wheel brace.

As Leo jacked the car up and started to remove the wheel nuts, Josh asked, "Is this going to be one of those 'seemed like a good idea at the time' things?"

"Why?" Leo asked.

Josh shrugged, "I dunno, I was just imagining CJ spinning 'White House Chief Of Staff maimed in freak wheel changing accident'." As Leo stopped what he was doing and glared up at Josh, Josh smiled nervously, "More likely to be the deputy who's maimed isn't it?"

"Answer my phone," Leo instructed.

"Hey, Margaret."

"Where are you?" she asked.

"We've got a flat."

"Oh God, he's changing it himself."

"Yeah."

"Ring me when he can't do it and I'll call the auto club for you."

Thirty minutes later, with Josh driving again, they've passed the church and gone up the hill. "What the hell does that say?" Leo asked as he struggled with Josh's shorthand.

"Wouldn't it have been easier if you'd driven?"

"I changed the wheel."

"Yeah, which I'm very impressed with."

Leo looked at him. "You are?"

"Yeah."

"Waiting for it to fall off?" Leo asked.

"Maybe a little. Second right," Josh read.

"Will you watch the road."

"You asked me what it said."

"It was rhetorical. Go right at that car dealership and then next left."

Josh followed the instructions and made the last left turn. "Okay, well apparently now we can't miss it."

"Keep driving."

Ten minutes later, "You think we missed it?" Josh asked.

Leo took out his cell phone and dialed. "Margaret, we turned right at the Ford dealers and then left. Where is it?"

"The Chrysler dealership," Margaret amended.

"Right," Leo hung up. "Stop and turn round. Should have been right at the Chrysler dealership."

"You know the president's going to hear about this don't you?" Josh asked.

"And guess who's fault it's going to be?"

"Yours," Josh said. "'Cos I'm the one who had the sense to write down..... I'll shut up."

"You need to go right here, you went left last time," Leo pointed out.

Josh turned right, then left and past the Ford dealer. He turned at the Chrysler dealer and then took the next left. "See, we can't miss it."

"The bunting a bit of a give away?" Leo asked.

"Yeah, but the real clue is the 300 secret service agents. We are going back on Air Force One aren't we?"

"Someone has to take the rental car back to the airport."

"By someone you mean me?"

"Yeah," Leo smiled.

Josh pulled up where the Secret Service point him to. "This was your fault. You wanted to meet Elliot," Josh started to protest, then he sighed, "I'll take the blame and the car."

Josh and Leo climbed out of the car and walked across the street. "Mr President."

Jed smiled, "CJ, cancel the call to search and rescue."

"Funny," Leo smiled.

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END
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